anyone out there?

i've been thinking lately. yes, yes, once in a while i actually do that.:P thinking about the possibilities of being in love, as well as the impossibilities. i mean, don't get me wrong, i'm not desperate. im good and complete right now. i know my worth, and i certainly know what im not. but lately, i can't help but realize that i seem to be blooming a little later than everyone else. it's not that it bothers me, but i'm still here, watching everyone around me as they put on wedding bands, to putting on diapers for their new born.

just last weekend, i was with some ol mates from school for dinner and a cup of coffee. being amongst them made me envious. i know, and they keep telling me the grass is greener, but hey, at least you chose to cross over when given the chance, whilst im just dying for that chance to even hop by. i just miss missing someone. miss the heartaches. someone that's worth all that ache.

been dying for an opportunity to make it work with someone, and not like the fucked up so-called relationships i've been having for the last decade or so. im really starting to wonder if i'll ever. i have never argued in a relationship for the past few years. half the time i don't even bother explaining myself. it has been a while since i actually got into an arguement worth arguing with someone about. i am not feeling solitary, and yet, i feel this need to share. im sure some of you out there share my predicament.

maybe i'm finally growing up, cos it certainly ain't about the sex anymore. boy, have i had enough. not that i'm complaining about having more than my fair share of sexual experiences but what i'm saying is that it just ain't enough anymore. frankly, im just dying for good honest conversation, emotional support, and a good nite's hug. yes yes, joey has been officially sissified. lol. don't blame me man, you will too.

recently watched the holiday on DVD. light and sweet. if only life has a beautiful warm ending like the movies eh. i wish. oh well, like pear said, just let it be, and it will come. i guess. :P keeping my fingers crossed. i'll just listen to pear. and so i'll wait...